Over the last few months, I have had some interesting things happen in my life. Most of which have caused me to take a complete look at what I really want from life and how to go about getting it.
I mean we all say I want this or I want that...but really are we truly going after what we want? Are we listening to the one part of us that will help us the most? I know I haven't been.
This has made me wonder, what if I began to listen to what my heart is trying to tell me and not rationalizing the decision in my head?
What I realized is that the Universe/God (what ever benevolent being you believe in) has thrown some choices in my path that made me really wonder about what I am doing, why am I not listening to my heart? I have had people come into my life that I thought were "nice" people and were being honest about what they wanted from me, completely ignoring the red flags, until they were being waved at me in such a way that I could no longer doubt what my heart had been telling me from the beginning, had I chosen to listen, and not get caught up in the newness and excitement of it all.
Now, not only I have met new people, I have had the absolute wonderful pleasure of being in touch with people from my past, (thank you Face Book) which made me realize that even though time continues, lives move forward, and your head softens the memories of what was or could have been, you realize your heart never forgot and you began to wonder...
What if I listened now, to that soft whispering that is my heart telling me I have known the truth all along, urging me to be honest, honest with how I felt then and how I still feel, yes even after all this time.
I believe it is out of fear that I have not listened to my heart, fear plain and simple (well maybe not so plain or simple) but fear none the less. Of course as I look at things now, I am wondering what am I afraid of? What is it that keeps me even now from taking this step and I realize it is as simple and complicated as something a friend said to me not to long ago...she told me that I was afraid to be happy, at first I laughed off her comment but now as I examine my life I am left with the complete understanding that she was right.
Of course the problem now becomes, will I listen to the whispering that is my heart talking to me or will I go on as usual, being afraid of what my heart is saying, being afraid yet safe by living on the edge of what might possibly be the truest happiness ever? Am I willing to take that chance?